Day 1 Of Fall In Love With Your Bank Account Challenge
The first exercise for today is to acknowledge how you really feel about your bank account.
I know it's counter intuitive because we're being taught to think only positive thoughts about money and the things we want in our lives.
Unfortunately, the law of attraction also responds to our deepest emotions and it's these emotions that impact our financial behaviour.
According to a recent study by Cowen & Keltner, humans are capable of feeling 27 different emotions and yet most of us can only identify 5 or 6 different emotions that we feel on any given day.
Why don't we always know how we feel?
I know most of us think we know how we feel, but psychological research has shown that we're not always aware of how we're feeling.
A big part of why we don't always understand our emotions with money is because we're not taught emotional intelligence.
We're taught to check out and go in quest of constant stimuli to make us feel better whenever life gets too intense or we feel uncomfortable.
We're not encouraged to sit with our emotions and go into our bodies to see what emotions we're carrying.
As a result, we're only aware of our most intense emotions and have no clue how our other subtle emotions impact our behaviour.
For years I believed my anxiety and panic attacks about money were what was causing my depression, yet strangely managing my anxiety didn't lessen my depression.
When I started going deeper, I realised that my shame about being in debt and being a failure was the root cause of my depression.
Affirmations didn't help me because I was affirming about the wrong thing - I was affirming about loving money, when my problem wasn't money, my problem, was shame and the belief that I was failure.
Becoming emotionally intelligent and aware of the shame I carried was the first step to dealing with my depression around money.
Understanding my emotion of shame, helped me trace the root cause (thoughts of failure) and as soon as I had that root cause I could start to do the work of untangling the stories around failure.
This was my first aha moment into understanding the layers of the subconscious mind and understanding that there was a lot more happening at the subconscious level than I'd ever know.
Over the years, I've learned a great truth: It's never about the money, it's about almost everything else but the money. The money is a symptom
My emotions were a great place to start understanding this on a deeper level.
Are you ready to find out how you really feel about your bank account?
Exercise for today
Step one: Use your breath as a tool (5 mins)
Our breath is connected to our emotions - when your emotions change, your breath changes as well.
We're often told to take deep breaths when feeling stressed or panicked so we can calm our nerves.
Breath is a key component in various meditation practices. It's a tool I use in the guided meditations in my online courses.
i. Go to your online banking profile, open up your bank account and go to the transactions page (personal or business, which ever one you use most)
ii. Put your cell phone on silent (not vibrate)
iii. Set a 5 minute timer on your phone
iv. Take a minute to scroll through your bank account and then close your eyes and observe your breathing for the next 5 minutes.
v. Breathe normally, DO NOT control your breath and try to sit as still as possible. Just observe your breath and accept everything that happens in this exercise. If your mind wanders, just bring it back to your breathing. No judging or criticising yourself!
vi. Grab a pen and paper and move onto step two when the alarm rings
Step two: Be honest with your bank account (10 mins)
Now we're going to write a letter to your bank account sharing the answers to these questions and sharing how you really feel in this moment.
This will help you release some of the stuck energy and emotions that are running the show.
Writing this letter also gets your subconscious to question itself, which is key when it comes to changing behaviour.
Remember to be brutally honest - you can't change something unless you acknowledge it's there.
i. Set your timer for 10 minutes
ii. Take a pen and paper and start writing (don't type this out - the act of writing is magical when it comes to uncovering your emotions)
iii.Set the intention to see how you truly feel about your bank account
iv. Be open and honest about what you feel, you'll be shocked by what comes up when you don't try to control what you write and you just write from the heart
v. In the letter tell your bank account how you truly felt by answering these questions:
What thoughts came up for you as you observed your breathing?
What emotions did you observe during the breathing exercise?
How did your body feel when you looked at your bank account?
Do these thoughts and emotions make you feel empowered or dis-empowered when you deal with money?
How do you treat your bank account when you feel this way?
vi. Start your letter with:
"Dear Bank Account,..."
vii. After writing your letter check in with yourself and take one full minute to take deep breaths in and out. It will help relax your mind and your body so you can be open to more insights as you go about your day
Step 3: Share your insights/ questions in the comment section below